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A Beautiful Aerialist

from Start of Something Blue by Nathan Mac

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lyrics

So, I was performing in a variety show
Lots of strange, dysfunctional, & glamorous people
But of course, I get chatting to the very beautiful Aerialist
Now, it turns out they had been all over the world with their skills
They’d seen amazing things
They trained everyday
& they REALLY really knew how to enjoy the pain of conditioning
Which is… essentially beating up your body
So that you’re ready to perform
It’s a very handy skill, if you want…
Well if you wanna get anywhere really
That, kind of, ability to push through
& to practice
To pre-empt
Takes a lot of discipline

Our talk
Very swiftly turned to death, of all things
& all of the things that we had to do before we die
They had such an obsession with mortality
I didn’t mind though
I love those conversations

Now I didn’t know at the time but
They had some kind of medical condition
They didn’t mention it much, but
The doctor once told them to stop dancing
To stop training physically…
That the demands of aerial were too overwhelming
& that it was going to shorten their life
I asked how much
& they told me between about
Twenty & thirty years
That’s crazy… right?
Like, what do you do?Do you…
Do you find something else?
Do you just stop what you love
& learn to love something else?

Like, when I got injured
I fell in love with music
It took a while, but I did
Now the Aerialist, well…
By the time I’d got talking to them
At least, that night
It had been ten years since the diagnosis
That’s ten YEARS of defiance
They refused the doctor’s advice
Refused to let their condition define them
They weren’t the condition
It’s just something they lived with

& like, they’re not stupid
They know full well that the aerial is killing them, but
Without it, at least…
In their opinion, by their standards
Without it, they couldn’t live

You know, after this conversation
I told them the story of Deirdre & Naoise
There was something in their defiance
That reminded me of Deirdre
This kind of…
In the face of everything
In the face of helplessness
You still decide to do what you wanna do
You still maintain your freedom
You still forge your own path

This story made them cry, but
They thanked me after
So I guess it helped
Maybe… they needed to get something off their chest
Or… they needed to hear about another person
Who was as defiant as them &
They just felt that little bit less alone
I’m not really sure what it did for them
I never really got to speak to them again, but
I wonder what they’re up to now

credits

from Start of Something Blue, released September 2, 2022
Lyrics: Nathan Mac
Music: Brian Dwyer

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all rights reserved

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about

Nathan Mac Dublin, Ireland

Nathan Mac ran away from the Circus to pursue a life of music. Now he’s back with both! Over the years, he’s sold out theatre’s, released a string of successful singles, founded his own record label, & written his own Circus musical! At the genesis of his career, there’s no better name for his debut album. This really is the ‘Start of Something Blue’.

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